Worst Sports Stories of 2006
by Mark HebertHoward Cosell once stated “sports is human life in microcosm,” and I tend to agree.
I’ve never won the “big-one” on Super Bowl Sunday and then hoisted a championship trophy, but I have beaten annoying in-laws in Trivial Pursuit on Christmas Eve and then stomped around the house like a rabid baboon. In my mind the two are synonymous.
Your boss is the head coach, police and judges are the referees and umpires and the IRS is a wicked case of jock-itch. Like sports, life is full of winners and losers.
Elsewhere in this issue of the Chronicle, I’ve highlighted the winners. The stories from 2006 which point out the accolades and achievements from the fine athletes in our community which made us cheer and feel Jim-dandy.
With that said, it’s time for the ugly. The sports stories from 2006 which remind us that to err is human and that we still love that uncle who comes over on the holidays, spikes the eggnog with cheap bourbon and then tells the children inappropriate stories about his time spent as a sailor in the Philippines. Without bad sports stories, there wouldn’t be good ones and without that crazy uncle’s rigmarole, life might be a bit bland.
Some critics of the media say that the negatives in sports are talked about too much. To them I say stop being so negative.
10. Eli, Eli, oh…
A story that started in 2004 left the New York Giants and quarterback Eli Manning with egg on their faces in 2006. Leading up to the 2004 NFL Draft, Eli — and former NFL QB and father Archie – asked the San Diego Chargers not to use their number one pick on the younger brother of NFL star Peyton Manning because he/they didn’t want to play for a losing team. The Chargers agreed and drafted Manning, but sent him to New York for the Giant’s first round pick – Phillip Rivers – as well as a first and fifth round pick in the 2005 draft.
Flash to 2006 where Rivers, in his first season as a starter, is headed to the Pro Bowl after a strong year, Shawnee Merriman – who San Diego obtained with the Giants first round pick – is a top contender for Defensive Player of the Year and the Bolts look like the real-deal heading into the playoffs with the best record in football at 14-2.
Flip the coin to the other side and Manning has not nearly lived up to expectations, has thrown just 10 more touchdowns than interceptions in his three years and led the Giants to a an 8-8 record and first round playoff berth in an extremely weak NFC division.
This story will be fun to follow over the next 10-years, but right now the Chargers look like champs and the Giants like chumps.
9. Friars and Twinkies forget to show-up …
After a grueling 162-game baseball season, the San Diego Padres and Minnesota Twins found themselves in the post season after eking-out Division Championships and home-field in the first round of the MLB playoffs. They then proceeded to fold faster than a card table stood upon by Rosie O’Donnell.
The Padres compiled a record of 88-74 – tied with Los Angeles in the National League West and narrowly won the division via a tie-breaker (Padres beating the Dodgers in 13 out of 18 meetings in the regular season ) to host the St. Louis Cardinals in the first round of the playoffs.
The Twins used an 18-11 mark in September to take over first place in a tough American League Central – the first and only day the team was in the top spot all season – to clinch the division giving themselves the home-field nod against the Oakland Athletics.
What resulted was the Twins getting swept in three games – outscored by a 16-7 margin in three games – and the Padres losing in four – only managing to score six runs in the process … ugly baseball for the small market teams.
8. Everything in Texas is big, even the mistakes …
The 2006 NFL Draft was one with tons of big names and potential superstar talent. The Houston Texans – perhaps the worst moniker in the NFL – had the pick of the litter with the number one overall selection after a 2-14 campaign left them with the worst record in football in 2005.
Dumbfounding everyone, Houston selected defensive-end Mario Williams over the likes of USC do-everything tailback Reggie Bush and hometown-hero and former Texas Longhorn great Vince Young.
Houston posted a 6-10 record in ‘06 while their number one stud racked up an average of 2.9 tackles per game – not shabby – while Bush and Young set the NFL on fire.
Bush – taken third overall by the New Orleans Saints – combined his rushing and receiving verticality to gain 1307 yards on the season, score nine touchdowns and help the once hapless Saints to a 10-6 record and a first-round bye in the playoffs.
Young got the starting job for the Tennessee Titans – who picked number two overall – midway through the season and at one point led his team to six straight come-from behind wins. The Titans narrowly missed the playoff – with an 8-8 record – but Young got some revenge on the Texans in Houston after he ripped a 39-yd touchdown run in week 15.
“I felt like my mom was chasing me with a belt,” Young jokingly said of his game-winning scamper.
The Texans may want to turn that belt on themselves.
7. Kids, stay in school, please…
Maurice Clarett, one of two people to make a return to the Chronicle’s Worst in 2006, made headlines this year after he allegedly robbed two people at gunpoint on January 1 in Columbus, Ohio.
As a freshman running back for Ohio State in 2002, Clarett led the Buckeyes to a national championship with a touchdown against Miami in the Fiesta Bowl. In 2003 he was suspended from the team for filling a false police report claiming he was robbed of $10,000 worth of goods. In that same year he lost a U.S. Supreme Court case challenging the NFL’s requirement that players wait three years after high school before turning pro. He missed the next two seasons before being drafted by the Denver Broncos in 2005. He was then cut by the Broncos in 2005 after a sub par performance in the team’s preseason.
Clarett reportedly made off with $150 and a cell phone after pointing a .45 caliber pistol at the victims in the January robbery and then sped away in a SUV. In September, Clarett struck a plea agreement and was sentenced to 3 ˝ years in prison.
6. The Longest Yard, Cincinnati-style …
This season, the Bengals put the “sin” in Cincinnati by having eight players arrested for off-field antics. At a rate of one for every two weeks of the
season, Bengals got arrested for spousal abuse, resisting arrest, driving boats and cars while under the influence as well as burglary.
The first arrest came when Odell Thurman – already suspended from the league for four games for violating the NFL’s substance abuse policy — was arrested for registered .18% on a blood-alcohol test, more than twice the legal limit in Ohio.
Nearly three months later the final Bengal, Deltha O’Neal, was also arrested for DUI. All told, the Bengals sent eight members to court and only three members to the Pro-Bowl.
5. “I’m such an Idiot…”
With a two-shot lead, and only four holes away from winning his third straight major, Phil Mickelson gave away the U.S. Open title at Winged Foot Golf Club in Mamaroneck, N.Y. in mid June.
“I still am in shock that I did that. I just can’t believe that I did that,” Mickelson said. “I am such an idiot.”
Indeed.
Mickelson, who eventually double-bogied 18 in the final round of the Open, started the last hole off the tournament with a shot off the tee which went so far left that it explored a group of trees before coming to a rest near a hospitality tent. Electing to try and hit the green instead of laying-up on the fairway, Mickelson’s next shot traveled about 25 yards. He hit his third shot into a bunker and then his fourth shot bypassed the green and landed in the rough. He then chipped a shot eight feet passed the cup before finally finding the cup with a putt for double-bogey.
Mickelson’s breakdown on 18 handed the 106th U.S. Open win to Geoff Ogilvy who fired a 2-over 74 on the day and netted $1.225 million for his effort.
“I think I was the beneficiary of a little bit of charity,” Ogilvy said.
Perhaps a bit of stupidity as well.
4. Baseball keeps passing the U.S. by…
In 1999, then Atlanta Braves pitchers Greg Maddux and Tom Glavine told Americans that “Chicks dig the long ball” in a Nike ad. With homeruns leaving Major League ballparks at record breaking clips for the past 20 years, not just chicks, but American’s love the long ball … and know we are paying for it.
Before the regular season of baseball got underway in the summer of 2005, teams from around the globe were asked to partake in “America’s Pastime” and then beat the Americans over the head in the 17-day tournament dubbed the World Baseball Classic.
The U.S. team – with superstars like Ken Griffey Jr., Chipper Jones and Alex Rodriguez – lost as many games (3) as they won and watched Cuba and Japan play baseball the old-fashioned and old-American way.
The Americans came into the tournament and figured they were good enough, and strong enough, to bash the ball out of parks and knock the other teams of the world off without much hubbub.
Actually, the teams from Latin America and Asia used stolen bases, bunts, sacrifices and solid defense and pitching to work their way to the championship while the Americans hit nine homeruns, struck out 27 times and left the party early.
As it is with basketball – another game that Americans invented – baseball in America has become about flash and less about substance and as a result, the rest of the world is beating us at our own games.
3. The French take bike riding serious
On July 2nd cyclists from around the world made their way to Strasbourg, near the French-German border, to compete in the 93rd Tour de France, a 22-day race through six countries. The French, who reportedly aren’t huge fans of the United States, must have been rejoicing when they heard Lance Armstrong, American cyclist and winner of the previous seven races, wasn’t in attendance.
Hold on Frenchies, here comes Floyd.
Floyd Landis, a former member of an Amish group in Pennsylvania, was viewed by cyclist know-it-alls as a dark horse contender in the 06 TdF. He got off to a slow start at the race, but near the final stages gave brilliant performances and eventually peddled into Paris 59 seconds before the rest of the riders to win the entire show.
It was only four days later that race officials claimed that Landis’ urine from Stage 17 of the race came back dirty and doping allegations followed. Landis gave race officials a back-up sample of his urine from that day (you should always have a back-up I suppose) and that sample was tested by the French government’s anti-doping clinical laboratory. It also came back dirty.
Landis sticks to his claims of no wrongdoing while the race officials refuse Landis as the 2006 winner. Landis was kicked off his team, banned from cycling and is currently awaiting an appeal of the findings and sanctions placed on him.
2. 25 million reasons why this guy is a jerk…
Somebody please call a time-out for T.O. Terrell Eldorado Owens, who after earning a spot in the Worst Sports Stories last year, just can’t get out of his own way this year. In March, after being run out of Philadelphia for his shenanigans, he signed a contract to play receiver for the Dallas Cowboys for three years and 25 million dollars.
In August, a few weeks in to training camp, T.O. misses practice and claims to have an injured hamstring. Doctors say he’s fine, Bill Parcells, Cowboys head coach, starts to feel an itch under his collar. T.O. continues to miss practice and Parcells benches him for the team’s second preseason game.
Dropped passes, touchdown catches, a broken finger and an “accidental overdose” follow. The following day, Owens’ publicist tells reporters that T.O. didn’t try to kill himself and that he “has 25 million reasons to live.”
In week 16, with his team in the midst of a losing streak, T.O. accounts for two touchdowns – good – and then spits in the face of Atlanta Falcons defensive back DeAngelo Hall – bad.
The fun and antics continue, but I digress. The Cowboys backed their way into the NFC playoffs, giving Terrell Eldorado Owens ample opportunity to add to his own personal circus.
1. The passing of a sports hero and how the Baseball Hall of Fame flubbed…
“Don’t shed any tears. You think about this: Here I am, the grandson of a slave. And here the whole world was excited about whether I was going into the Hall of Fame or not. We’ve come a long ways.” – Buck O’Neil after finding out that he’d been passed over for the Baseball Hall of Fame in February.
On October 6, John Jordan “Buck” O’Neil died from complications of congestive heart failure in Kansas City, Mo. Buck was born 93 years earlier in Carrabelle, Florida, and left the Sunshine state in 1934 to play semi-professional baseball and barnstorm with several teams in the Negro Leagues.
Minus a brief stint in the United States Navy from 1943-45, Buck was either playing, managing, working as a scout or working to keep the memories of the Negro Leagues alive for the next 73 years.
In his playing days, Buck manned first base for such teams as the New York Tigers and was a member of a Kansas City Monarchs team which won five consecutive Negro American League Pennants in the late 30’s and early 40’s.
In the mid 50’s, became a scout for the Chicago Cubs and signed the likes of Lou Brock and Ernie Banks and in 1962 was named the first black coach in the majors as he skippered the Cubs. In 1999, and never very far from baseball or telling stories of the game, he helped lead an effort to get a Negro League Baseball Museum built in Kansas City.
In February of this year, a five-member committee of Negro League historians – appointed by the Baseball Hall of Fame – selected 39 players from the Negro League players for possible induction to the National Baseball Hall of Fame. Buck made the list.
O’Neil, along with former Dodger great Minnie Minoso, the only two living members out of the 39, were both snubbed by the HOF voters. Who knows what they voters were thinking, but they were wrong.
Two months after his death, Buck O’Neil was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by George W. Bush, due to his “excellence and determination both on and off the baseball field,” according to the White House news release.
Better late than never and hopefully the HOF voters were paying attention.
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